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Jokes for your friends who are sick and tired

Halloween wheelchair

Fear of Western Medicine comes out of the closet on Halloween

“Nurse,” an anxious mother whimpers, “can you please tell me how my son is? He’s the one who swallowed the quarters.”

“No change yet,” the nurse replies. AhaJokes.com

Do you tighten up with fear each time you visit a friend or family member in the hospital? You’re not alone. In the US, the fear of doctors and dentists is right up there with the terrors of death, darkness, snakes, heights, and public speaking. Why are Americans so afraid of health care?

“Did you hear about the guy who lost his left arm and leg in a car accident?”

“Don’t worry, he’s alright now.” GreatCleanJokes

Despite the fact that laughter is good for your health, medical schools neglect to provide courses on humor, and other important things like compassion and nutrition.

Dr. Patch Adams is a firm believer in the healing power of laughter. He put his medical degree and career on the line as he relentlessly laughed his way through medical school. Because traditional Western Medicine had little tolerance for his funny ways, he founded Gesundheit Institute, “a project in holistic medical care based on the belief that one cannot separate the health of the individual from the health of the family, the community, the world, and the health care system itself.”

At Gasundheit, health care is free, and full of fun and play.

Instead of letting your worst nightmares stifle you, use your dread of doctors, dentists, hospitals or shots to motivate you to prevent illness. Work on making better choices in your lifestyle and daily habits. Your fears are there to protect you. Use them wisely.

“Doctor, my hair keeps falling out. Can you give me something to keep it in?”

“Any glass jar will do,” the doctor replies. AhaJokes

Americans spend over $8,500 per capita on health care, more than any other nation in the world. Despite all this spending, American longevity ranks at the bottom of the list of developed countries. Life expectancy is an overall measure of the quality of life in a country. See the CIA World FactBook for the complete list of countries.

The Western medical community implants the belief that “prevention” requires visiting your doctor, taking a prescription, or checking in for surgery. Remember Angelina Jolie? This is no laughing matter!

Why We Need to Do Doctor Reviews on Our Last Doctors’ Visits

Patch Adams cartoon - empathetic doctor

“Doc,” says Steve, “I want to be castrated.”

“What on earth for?”

“I’ve been thinking about it for a long time. My wife insists that I should have had it done a long time ago. If you won’t do it, I’ll go to another doctor.”

“OK, but I advise you not to.”

Steve has the operation. The next day he walks down the hospital corridor very slowly, legs apart. Heading toward him is another patient walking the same way.

“Hi there,” says Steve, “looks like you just had the same operation as me.”

“Yeah,” says the patient, “I finally got circumcised too.”

“Steve’s eyes widen in horror, “Oh no! How do you pronounce that word?” Jokes.com

The next time you visit a friend or family member in the hospital, make a special effort to make him or her laugh. You won’t be able to help everyone in the hospital, but you can make a difference for one person.

When I woke up after a surgery I had a few years ago, I remember feeling elated. Not only was I happy to still be alive, but also the pain medication was good stuff. My good friend, Cecile, sat on the bed, held my hands and made me laugh. It felt so good to giggle with her, despite the fact that it caused blood to gush from my fresh suture. She had me in bloody stitches!

Instead of bringing cut flowers that wilt and die within a few days, bring the gift of laughter:

Bring some whoopee cushions for your friend and the nurse.

Tell jokes to lift his or her spirit.

Bring a funny movie.

Hire a local comedian to perform for an hour.

Find a comedian through GigMasters or FunnyBusiness, or contact a local comedy club for a referral.

ComedyCures Logo EPS with website

A blond is having sharp pains in her side. The doctor examines her and says, “You have acute appendicitis.”

Wimpering, the blond says, “that’s nice of you doc, but I’m here for medical advice.”  Jokes.com

Good advice from Robin Williams: Carpe Diem

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CLICK ON IMAGE TO SUBSCRIBE NOW to Rascal Radio, the world’s first online personal development radio service. By putting positive thoughts into your mind every day, you can heal wounds. You can start living the life you’ve always wanted to live.

doctorlorraine

Author doctorlorraine

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